a special feature from Kay Ziplow & Leslie Zinberg, founders
When it comes down to saying yes, it often seems so easy to just give in to what’s at hand and say ‘yes’. Yes, I can fix that. Yes, I can make you that special dinner you want rather than what’s already been prepared. Yes, I will buy you that toy. But what we all must remind ourselves daily is that we must also leave space for the art of saying NO.
Saying “no” gives you the ability to set your own boundaries. The Art of Saying No really comes down to setting boundaries and making decisions from a place of abundance, rather than fear. When you make fear-based decisions, you’re generally thinking about missing out.
As Grandparents, we all are fearful of the word ‘ no’ and the boundaries when it comes to our grandchildren… but, healthy limitations are an important part of any relationship. When used effectively, they establish expectations regarding the relationship and encourage people to treat each other mindfully and respectfully.
Having limitations, and being able to express ‘no’ is especially important in parent-grandparent relationships because they not only establish roles and expectations, but also provide a structure that keeps the children from being confused or caught in the middle.
Saying ‘no’ is an expression of true love and consideration. Many times, it’s beneficial for everyone, kids and parents alike… and even for your relationships with your significant other. Haven’t you at least on one occasion said ‘no’ to that decadent dessert that just called to you on the menu? Well, saying ‘no’ sounds the same when it comes into the grandparent corner. Try it. It can earn you respect, dignity, and promote thoughtfulness. It is truly a sign of love.
Check out our previously posted article on grandparent-to-grandparent tips to help you understand and implement The Art of saying of no, in your life.